walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
