So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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