its not stalking. its research.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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