it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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