This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
