no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
whose parrot is this?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
