Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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