You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
She announced her abortion via fbk
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
