I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
