i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Randomize