Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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