I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
