Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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