Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
