But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
