when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
