I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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