That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
