just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
