brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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