I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Can I color on your dick again?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
