There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
