if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
