yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
