PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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