So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
