So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
We need to get me chipped asap
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