I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
