dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
