i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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