So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
