It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
