Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
