It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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