How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
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