There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
