You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Semen is not good for contacts.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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