Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
