just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
