You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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