How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Randomize