I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
