you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
