I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
