My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
