You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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