So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
