There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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