Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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