He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
