So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
