i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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