look no pants
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Randomize
